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Your Child's Journey

wisdom for the big steps little children take

You are here: Home / Archives for All Ages

Baby Proofing and Child Safety

September 4, 2015 By Diane Constantine

This month I have been kept very busy with a lot of web site moving, updating, and computer repair from a virus. Needless to say, I haven’t had much time to add new information to Your Child’s Journey or even correspond much. But one thing did come to my inbox that I think you will really like to know about.

Baby Proofing and Child Safety at Home: A Complete Guide
This a very interesting web site with so much valuable information to help parents keep their children safe.

The site is divided up according to the type of danger. For babies to preschoolers the information I thought most helpful would be the Chocking and Suffocation section, Preventing Injuries from Falls, and Poison Safety. Other sections you might want to read are: Electrical Safety, Kitchen Safety, and Car, Garage, and Outdoor Safety.

I realize that some of the suggestions just won’t work in Malaysia, but being aware of the danger, you will be able to come up with ways that work for you.

Our children grow so quickly and what was not a danger to them last week, may need our attention now. I suggest you get down at your child’s eye level and take a look around your house and any other place your child spends much time. You will more easily spot interesting, but dangerous things that you will want to change.

Hovering and being over-protective, teaches your children to fear for their own safety. It is better to child-proof your home, then your child can explore and learn, safe from serious dangers.

One thing I feel parents must teach their children is to stop when they tell them to. Children must learn this is not negotiable. Use the same word and tone each time you tell your child to stop. It is not a game nor is obedience a choice. This takes persistence on the parents’ part and consistency. But it may be the most important safety precaution you can take.

I heard the story of a mom who played a game with her young child. He was to do the opposite of whatever she said. So if she said, “Come”, he would go. If she said, “Sit”, he would stand. One day, seeing her son run toward the street, she yell, “Stop”. Yes, you know the tragic ending of this tale. He ran full steam into the street and was killed by an oncoming car that could not have seen him.

Of course I don’t believe any of you would be as foolish as that mom. But by neglecting to reinforce your authority you could unwittingly put your child in danger.

We trust our children to God’s care. He loves our children even more than we do. He protects our children from so many things we could not prevent. But I believe He also wants us to be responsible and do our part to give our children a safe and healthy environment to grow in.

Take a look around. Fix whatever you need to improve your safety standards. Pray for your family’s safety. And then enjoy each other and watch the miracle of your child’s development.

Filed Under: All Ages Tagged With: child proofing, safety

As Long as the Baby is Healthy

July 30, 2015 By Diane Constantine

How many times have you used an automatic response only to wish you could grab it back or blow it away before it could be heard? Or, on the other hand, how many times has someone responded automatically to you and you cringe, not able to say what you really feel?

I just read an insightful article that illustrates my point. Please take a few minutes to read, As Long as the Baby is Healthy…But What if He’s Not?

Micha Boyett, told the story of her third pregnancy. She and her husband had received the prenatal diagnosis that the baby she was carrying was Down syndrome. They shared this news with their family and close friends.

But like any parents in a similar situation, they struggled with their fears. They didn’t know the depth of his medical issues or the long-lasting effects on their other boys and their future plans. However, there was no visible difference between this pregnancy and her others.

So she was confronted over and over again with the well-meaning questions of total strangers. “How’s the pregnancy going?” they asked. “Is everything healthy?” She didn’t want to lie, but she also didn’t want to tell them the truth.

She writes, “Of course we always say to strangers the easiest thing. I understand that. We all crave ease, pleasure. The cuter the better. The least amount of struggle, the happier. We ask if the pregnancy is healthy expecting smiles and head nods because it’s too scary to admit that sometimes pregnancies are not.”

How many times did she hear, “Well, all that matters is that he’s healthy, right?” Yet she knew her baby was not what others would consider healthy.

I was so touched by her conclusions:

“All of us who are parents will suffer, whether that is early in our baby’s life or later. Loving always brings pain, whatever we say to one another, however we strive to cover our fears with easy words.”

“What matters is how we receive each other. How we receive the ones we’ve been given to love. I receive this, Lord. I receive him. I receive my child.”

“What matters is how we love.”

Now I’m thinking of some other automatic responses.

  • “Well, at least you have two other healthy boys.”  (minimizing the problems)
  • “You shouldn’t have gotten pregnant after you turned 35.” (judging)
  • “We need to rejoice in all circumstances.” (moralizing)
  • “What are you going to do about it?” (scrutinizing)
  • Or the worst of all, “I just remembered I have an appointment in a few minutes.” (vaporizing)

Do you care to add some of the automatic responses you have used or had used on you? Email: diane

As friends and believers there are some things we can do and say.

  • We can sit and listen while they pour out their heart.
  • We can offer specific help. “I’d like to pick up your sons from preschool and take them out to the park for a romp. Is today good?” or ”I’m on my way to the grocery. What can I pick up for you?”
  • We can stay in touch. Pray, call, visit, or send short encouraging messages.

I’m going to make a more concerted effort to listen before I respond, to let my love and care show instead of dispensing my pat replies. How about you?


You might also like to read What to Expect When Your Baby is Born with a Disability

 

Filed Under: All Ages Tagged With: Down Syndrome, healthy

Pregnancy Q&A

July 1, 2015 By Diane Constantine

My husband came across this Q & A. I couldn’t find the original source for it and you may have already seen it, but it tickled my funny bone. Since laughter is a good medicine, have a small dose today.

Pregnancy Q&A

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q: I’m two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A. With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q.What is the most reliable method to determine a baby’s sex?
A. Childbirth.

Q. My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she’s borderline irrational.
A. So what’s your question?

Q. My childbirth instructor says it’s not pain I’ll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A. Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q. When is the best time to get an epidural?
A. Right after you find out you’re pregnant.

Q. Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A. Not unless the word “alimony” means anything to you.

Q. Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth?
A. Yes, pregnancy.

Q. Do I have to have a baby shower?
A. Not if you change the baby’s diaper very quickly.

Q. Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A. When the kids are in college.

I’d love to add to this list. If you have some of your own, please send them to me so I can pass them along.  Email your comments

Have at least one good belly laugh today!

Filed Under: All Ages Tagged With: humor, pregnancy

What is an Intense Child?

March 26, 2015 By Diane Constantine

This is one of a series of articles from RaisingLifeLongLearners.com. If this article describes your child, please go to Coleen Kessler’s site to read the whole series or sign up for her weekly newsletter.

If you have an intense child, you probably know it. Call them spirited, emotionally intense, difficult, high needs, or challenging…it doesn’t matter.

You know them and you’re tired. And defeated. And sure you’re doing everything all wrong because those parenting books other parents swear by just don’t work for you.

The intense child is more – more emotional, more energetic, more sensitive, more empathetic, more focused, more distracted, more, more, more – than other children.

Characteristics of an Intense Child

If you’re still struggling to determine whether your child is intense or just ill-behaved like everyone seems to think, take a few minutes to look through these characteristics. Do you see your child described? You’re probably dealing with an emotionally intense kiddo that just needs a different parenting approach. Let’s problem solve together.

An intense child is:

[Read more…]

Filed Under: All Ages Tagged With: intense, spirited

Positive Parent’s Creed

March 5, 2015 By Diane Constantine Leave a Comment

With the beginning of Spring around the corner, I thought this was a good time to review some of our foundational principles and practices that will help us to be the best parents we can be to the children God has given us.

My husband wrote this Positive Parent’s Creed many years ago and we feel it has stood the test of time in our own parenting and now in your generation of parents. Please consider each one. If you have questions or comments you’d like to make about any of them, please feel free to email me. I’ll be happy to discuss them with you.

The Positive Parent’s Creed

We will let our children know we love them no matter what they do.

* Our children will learn that love is not earned, love is freely given.

We will be honest about our mistakes, remembering to ask our children to forgive us when we fail them or misunderstand them.

* Our children will learn the value of personal honesty instead of hypocrisy.

We will give each child some individual time and attention every day.

*Our children will learn that they are important to us, not a nuisance that we endure.

We will listen to our children as well as talk to them.

* Our children will learn that listening to one another is one of the most loving things we can do for each other.

We will help our children develop a genuine personal faith in God.

* Our children will learn, through our example, the value of a genuine faith.

We will correct our children with love.

*Our children will learn that discipline is an expression of love.

We will teach proper relationship to authority.

*Our children will learn that respect for authority is the key to a successful life.

We will encourage proper independence.

*Our children will develop a strong conscience. They will learn to withstand and overcome the negative pressures around them.

Filed Under: All Ages Tagged With: parenting, practices, principles

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