Making it Work

January 10, 2013 By Diane Constantine Leave a Comment

Barbara Nicols is one of our First Steps family. She has a gift for writing. Thank you, Barbara, for sharing a day like we all have from time-to-time and telling us what you did with it.

Diane

Okay so I don’t exactly enjoy grocery shopping. I love making food, dreaming up new recipes and combinations, pouring over my favorite worn Better Homes & Gardens cookbook, measuring & ingredients for a new recipe.

I love seeing the excitement on little faces as they clamber to the table on a Saturday morning, grabbing eagerly for a homemade cinnamon roll or banana walnut waffle to eat with their blueberries or pineapples.

But I don’t love shopping. In fact sometimes, most times I dread it. And it is even more dread-worthy (is that a word) when I must bring my little twosome along. The twosome are jolly and raucous and completely adorable and mostly manageable when they are within the familiar confines of home and yard. But put them in a brightly lit supermarket with hundreds of thousands of hands off items, anchored to a rickety and crowded cart, forced to watch me linger over which head of broccoli is the firmest, which type of milk for my tea, which bag of frozen edamame has more…and they go just a little bit cuckoo. Grabbing things off the shelves, giving a poke or an unwanted tickle to their sibling, fighting over who gets to put the steel cut oats in the cart (yes, just about anything looks exciting when someone else is getting to do it!)…Needless to say I don’t exactly enjoy shopping with my children. At least not all of them at once…when I’m pressed for time and on a strict budget..

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Intensity

May 25, 2011 By Diane Constantine 1 Comment

This month I am continuing with more from the book, Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. The topic is Intensity. Some of you are blessed with a calm child who rarely or never shows great intensity in their reactions. Count your blessings! Others of you have a child or children who have very intense reactions. These are the children who often throw a fit when frustrated or scream with delight. Even if you don’t have an intense child, you may be able to help a mom who does to find the key to calming her child.

In this installment we’ll look at how you can identify an on-coming tornado of emotions and how to defuse it. Knowing your own child’s cues will help you learn how to calm them and then teach your child to recognize the signs and calm themselves. As in all our parenting, the goal is to help our child learn self control.
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Bad Reasons to Avoid Early Intervention

October 6, 2010 By Diane Constantine Leave a Comment

So maybe your pediatrician has talked to you about getting early intervention services for your child, or you’ve let your doubts about your child’s development lead you into making a few phone calls about it. You’re worried about your child, but you’re also worried that getting help will mean there really is something wrong. These five reasons to skip EI may be nagging at you, tempting you to just go on and hope for the best. Don’t listen. They’re bad reasons. Here’s why.

1. I don’t want to label my child.
The “label” your child gets to qualify for early intervention doesn’t go on his “permanent record” — many kids go from EI right into regular education preschools and kindergartens. The idea is to label now so that there’s no need to label later. Because those labels that come later stick a lot harder.

2. My family thinks it’s a bad idea.
Mothers and fathers and in-laws and siblings are always full of advice, but as a parent, the buck stops with you. You spend more time observing your child than anyone, and if you have concerns, they need to be respected — if not by others, then absolutely by yourself. Follow your gut.

3. My child will catch up on her own.
Maybe, but you’re gambling with your child’s life here. When your child is five and still delayed, you’re not going to be able to dial things back and try early intervention. Early intervention will do no harm, and may do a great deal to help. Why take a chance when you don’t need to?

4. Children need to play and have fun, not do therapy.
Sending your child to early intervention is not like sending him to boot camp. It’s fun. Your child will think he’s playing as he does things to strengthen his motor skills and gain meaningful language. You’ll have fun watching it, too.

5. I’ll just work with my child myself.
Terrific! Work with your child yourself! There are lots of hours in the day. Doing early intervention doesn’t mean doing nothing else. You’ll still want and need to work with your child. But chances are the intervention therapists will be able to give you ways to do that so much more effectively.

For many more articles on related topics see: SpecialChildren.About.com

Find Your Happy Parent Place

September 22, 2010 By Diane Constantine Leave a Comment

Editor’s Note: This is a wonderful article with good ideas on how to keep your sanity and your marriage in the midst of parenting. Pick one and start doing it today. You’ll be happy you did!
Diane

Admit it: Parenting can be a real grind sometimes. But if you follow these six simple mantras, you’ll have a lot more fun — and so will your kids.
By Scott Westcott

How to Be Happier, Now

Welcome to a typical mom morning. It begins when your toddler dive-bombs into your bed at 5 a.m. You stumble through the dark for an eyes-half-open diaper change. Next comes breakfast. The daily recipe: spilled milk and fistfuls of Cheerios dumped on the floor. Then you do the dishes and get your child dressed, all before you drink your morning coffee. Are we having fun yet? The answer is not so simple.

Being a parent is inspiring and rewarding, but it’s also demanding and thankless. A recent Princeton University survey found that typical childcare tasks are roughly as pleasurable as housework — in other words, not very. But the fact is that our kids are our pride and joy. How can this be, when they’re also a drag on our quality of life?

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