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Your Child's Journey

wisdom for the big steps little children take

You are here: Home / Archives for attitudes

What a Difference a Mom Makes

July 1, 2014 By Diane Constantine

Some time ago I bought Dr. Kevin Leman’s book, What a Difference a Mom Makes, the indelible imprint a mom leaves on her son’s life. There is so much in the book that will help moms raise their sons to be the kind of men she can be proud of.

He summarizes 10 of his main points in the following excerpt:

The Top 10 Countdown to Being an Awesome Mom

10. Remember, he’s a boy, not a girl.

9. I know he’s adorable, but he needs to be held accountable.

8. Don’t always pay attention to how he looks; pay more attention to his heart.

7. How you handle his failures is more important than how you handle his victories.

6. No two children in a family should be treated the same, because they’re not the same—including your boy.

5. Remember that your boy will only stay weird for about 15 years.

4. He’s the wavy line—all over the place. You need to be the consistent one.

3. Start with the end in mind. Who do you want your son to be?

2. You don’t get to relive moments. Make every day count.

1. Many have tried, and no one’s succeeded—you can’t do it all. But what you do will make a lasting difference in the life of your son.

Here are a few action points to help you in raising your son:

1. Make your home a place of connection.
A place of unconditional acceptance. . .
with a sense of belonging. . .
and the knowledge that you consider him competent and capable.

2. Teach him to be kind and courteous, and you’ll heap blessings on his head.

3. Be loving and consistent in your discipline.

4. Present age-appropriate choices.

5. Hold your child accountable for his actions.

6. Let reality be the teacher.

Whether or not you have a son, I hope you have seen some things that you want to incorporate in your parenting style. All kids can benefit from these good approaches to parenting.

Filed Under: All Ages Tagged With: attitudes, character, parenting

A Target for Life

July 5, 2013 By Diane Constantine Leave a Comment

I want to share an article written by Rachel Stafford, published in Mamapedia.com. She experienced, in a poignant way, the importance of special moments of connection with her child. I hope you find little, daily targets that will make good memories for you and your children.

___________________________________________

I reached into her pajamas drawer unconsciously grabbing the worn polka-dotted flannel that felt like home in my hand.

“Those don’t fit me anymore, Mama,” my 6-year-old daughter informed ever so gently, as if somehow knowing those words could literally break my heart.

“Are you sure they don’t fit?” I asked with a hint of desperation in my voice. “Could we just see?” I already had the head opening of the pajamas prepped and ready for her curly head of hair.

My easy-going child shrugged and happily pulled the pajamas over her head to appease me. But as she struggled to stuff her 6-year-old arms into size 4 armholes, we began to laugh.

“Okay, you were right, “I grinned. But honestly, I wanted to cry. [Read more…]

Filed Under: All Ages Tagged With: attitudes, time

Making it Work

January 10, 2013 By Diane Constantine Leave a Comment

Barbara Nicols is one of our First Steps family. She has a gift for writing. Thank you, Barbara, for sharing a day like we all have from time-to-time and telling us what you did with it.

Diane


Okay so I don’t exactly enjoy grocery shopping. I love making food, dreaming up new recipes and combinations, pouring over my favorite worn Better Homes & Gardens cookbook, measuring & ingredients for a new recipe.

I love seeing the excitement on little faces as they clamber to the table on a Saturday morning, grabbing eagerly for a homemade cinnamon roll or banana walnut waffle to eat with their blueberries or pineapples.

But I don’t love shopping. In fact sometimes, most times I dread it. And it is even more dread-worthy (is that a word) when I must bring my little twosome along. The twosome are jolly and raucous and completely adorable and mostly manageable when they are within the familiar confines of home and yard. But put them in a brightly lit supermarket with hundreds of thousands of hands off items, anchored to a rickety and crowded cart, forced to watch me linger over which head of broccoli is the firmest, which type of milk for my tea, which bag of frozen edamame has more…and they go just a little bit cuckoo. Grabbing things off the shelves, giving a poke or an unwanted tickle to their sibling, fighting over who gets to put the steel cut oats in the cart (yes, just about anything looks exciting when someone else is getting to do it!)…Needless to say I don’t exactly enjoy shopping with my children. At least not all of them at once…when I’m pressed for time and on a strict budget..

[Read more…]

Filed Under: All Ages Tagged With: attitudes

Have a New Kid by Friday Review

October 3, 2011 By Diane Constantine Leave a Comment

Dr. Kevin Leman wrote a wonderful book to help parents with discipline called, Have a New Kid by Friday. I reviewed some of the major concepts of the book and some specific examples of how it works for Toddlers. You can see the series of articles one at a time here:

Part 1– Acceptance, Belonging, and Competence

Part 2– Attitudes

Part 3– Character

Part 4– Discipline

Part 5– Temper Tantrums and Bedtime Battles

Part 6– Let Reality Be the Teacher and B Doesn’t Happen Until A Is Completed

done

Filed Under: All Ages Tagged With: attitudes, bedtime battles, character, discipline, temper Tantrums

Intensity

May 25, 2011 By Diane Constantine 1 Comment

This month I am continuing with more from the book, Raising Your Spirited Child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. The topic is Intensity. Some of you are blessed with a calm child who rarely or never shows great intensity in their reactions. Count your blessings! Others of you have a child or children who have very intense reactions. These are the children who often throw a fit when frustrated or scream with delight. Even if you don’t have an intense child, you may be able to help a mom who does to find the key to calming her child.

In this installment we’ll look at how you can identify an on-coming tornado of emotions and how to defuse it. Knowing your own child’s cues will help you learn how to calm them and then teach your child to recognize the signs and calm themselves. As in all our parenting, the goal is to help our child learn self control.
[Read more…]

Filed Under: All Ages Tagged With: attitudes, meltdown, screaming, tantrums

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